Aanaya Fereira: The Day the Toilet Talked Back!

A true (and incredibly embarrassing) tale of one woman's bizarre bathroom encounter.
"Prepare yourself... for a toilet tale so unbelievable, you'll be giggling for days."
- The Daily Laugh
It was a Monday morning like any other. I awoke, stumbled to the bathroom, and settled in for my usual routine. But as I sat down on the porcelain throne, a strange thing happened. The toilet flushed by itself.
"What the... ?" I exclaimed, startled.
I looked around, but there was no one else in the bathroom. The windows were shut, and the wind wasn't blowing. It was as if the toilet had a mind of its own.
"I said, what the heck?" I repeated, my voice a little louder this time.
To my astonishment, the toilet flushed again. And then it spoke.
"Excuse me, Aanaya," the toilet said in a deep, resonant voice. "I'm having a bit of a plumbing problem."
Yes, you read that right. My toilet was talking to me.
I couldn't believe my ears. I stared at the toilet in disbelief, my jaw dropping to the floor.
"You can talk?" I gasped.
"Of course I can talk," the toilet replied. "I'm a smart toilet. I have Wi-Fi, Bluetooth, and a built-in Alexa."
I had never heard of a smart toilet before, but there it was, proving its existence by talking to me.
"Well, it's nice to meet you, Mr. Toilet," I said. "But I'm a little confused. Why are you talking to me?"
"I'm talking to you because I need your help," the toilet explained. "My plumbing is acting up, and I don't know how to fix it. Can you please call a plumber for me?"
I couldn't help but laugh. The toilet was actually asking me to call a plumber.
"Sure, no problem," I said. "I'll call a plumber right now."
I got up from the toilet and reached for my phone. As I was dialing, I couldn't help but wonder what my plumber would think when I told him I was calling on behalf of a talking toilet.
"Hey, Mr. Plumber? Yeah, it's Aanaya Fereira. My toilet is talking to me..."
- Me, on the phone with the plumber
I'll spare you the details of the plumber's visit, but let's just say it was an experience I'll never forget. The plumber fixed the toilet, but not before giving me a puzzled look and muttering something about "talking toilets" and "too much coffee."
As for the toilet, it's been working perfectly ever since. I've decided to name it "Chatty Cathy" in honor of its newfound ability to communicate.
So there you have it, my friends. The true and unbelievable story of the day my toilet talked back. I'm still not sure how it happened, but I'm glad Chatty Cathy is back to its old, silent self. At least until the next time it decides to engage in conversation, that is.
"If you thought this story was hilarious, share it with your friends! Let's all have a good laugh at Aanaya Fereira's expense."
- The Daily Laugh