8 Things That Can Be Used Against You In A Divorce And How To Avoid Them



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Divorce is quite a harrowing experience for a couple who has decided to end their marriage. “A divorce is a very complicated process. It is one of the most traumatic experiences for any couple. A contested  this site  divorce can be a long-winded and costly affair,” explains Siddhartha. You not only have to make the emotionally tough decision to separate from your partner but also figure out other logistics – finding a lawyer, checking your finances, finding a house, child custody, source of income, etc.

With so much going around, your emotions are likely to run high and force you to act in ways that prove to be detrimental to your case. It is extremely important to be in control of your actions before and during divorce proceedings because any kind of behavior could be construed as inappropriate by your spouse and be used as evidence against you in court. Being aware of your behavior becomes all the more necessary if there are children involved in the case.
1. Do not indulge in extraordinary spending of marital assets
What not to do during divorce? One of the most important divorce tips for men and women is to refrain from unnecessary or questionable spending because everything is traceable. Siddhartha elaborates, “There is something called dissipation of assets or marital waste that is taken into consideration when you file for divorce. It means the deliberate and conscious destruction of marital assets by one partner. These assets would have otherwise been distributed equally between the couple during the proceedings. But if they’ve been depleted by one spouse alone, it could pose a major problem.”


2. Don’t hide or move assets, money or other funds
This is one of those things you need to add to your ‘what not to do during a divorce’ list. Hiding assets from your spouse or moving money out of joint bank accounts before the divorce is a bad idea and will only prove detrimental to your case. It will raise the same red flags as extravagant spending of marital money or assets.

There’s a lot of paperwork involved in a marriage – home loans, taxes, joint bank accounts, credit cards, property papers, and more – all of which can be used as evidence against you in court, if your spouse thinks you’re hiding or withholding assets, money or other funds. If you’re found guilty, it’ll damage your credibility as well as your case.

3. Avoid a romantic relationship until officially divorced
If you’re wondering what can be used against you in a divorce, this is one. Romantic relationships are one of the most common things that can be used as evidence against you during divorce proceedings. It is normal to move on with someone else after separating from your spouse but doing the same before the divorce is finalized could create a problem for you.


Being in a relationship with someone else will hurt your chance of a quick divorce and might interfere with you getting a favorable outcome, especially if you have children. Even if your new partner shares a good relationship with your offspring, their background will be heavily scrutinized and questioned. It might just affect your chance of getting your child’s custody or visitation rights.

4. Get restraining orders in case of violence
This is one of the most crucial divorce tips for women and men. According to Siddhartha, “Staying in a broken home could cause additional tension, especially if your partner is abusive or if you are constantly fighting in front of your children.” If you’re filing for divorce due to domestic violence or any other kind of emotional abuse, you also have the right to file for a restraining or protective order. It is also possible that your partner gets violent or becomes abusive during the proceedings. In such a situation, it is important that you know how to protect yourself in a divorce and filing a restraining order is one way.

5. Posting on social media
While making a list of what not to do during a divorce, put this right at the top. If you’re thinking about what can be used against you in a divorce, social media posts top the list. Even if you posted something on impulse before and then deleted the same, it will stick around forever. It is possible to retrieve it.

If your partner finds out about any such post that puts them in a negative light, their lawyer will use it against you in court. You may not have meant any harm but social media posts can be used as evidence against you in a divorce. It is one of the easiest and most convenient ways for partners to track or accuse each other of inappropriate behavior.

6. Be mindful of the text messages and emails you send
This is another point to add to your ‘what not to do during divorce’ and ‘what can be used against you in a divorce’ lists. Be careful and mindful of the words you choose to write in the text messages and emails you send to your partner. Anything you put in writing can and will be used as evidence against you in court.


Like social media posts, text messages and emails are also traceable and easy to retrieve even if you’ve deleted them. No chat or communication is private. There is nothing called secret chatting. Social media, emails, and text messages are increasingly being used as evidence in not only divorce cases but also otherwise. Your partner or their lawyer can also submit a subpoena asking for your call logs, messages, and emails.

7. Never act out of spite or anger
This is, again, one of the most important divorce tips for women and men. What can be used against you in a divorce, you wonder? Things said in anger or spiteful actions definitely qualify. In such stressful situations, emotions usually run high and you may feel the urge to act on an impulse to get back at your partner. But, it is extremely important to keep your emotions in check and control your anger while going through a divorce.

Anything you say or write in anger can and will be used as evidence against you. Letting your anger get the better of you will do you more harm than good. It’s not easy but if you act without thinking, the divorce may not yield the desired results. Maintain your composure and avoid making rash decisions for a smooth process.