Displaced

The others appeal to me and repel me equally;

They have rendered meaningless my well-worn vanity.

Oh vain is my world!

And vain is life!

And vain are my words

Deep in the night…

Distended between rhyme and reason,

I do not know what to aim for;

Lulled by the pleasures of the season

And dulled by what I said before…

Could someone please clear my mind

And help me sense that I belong?

Or tell me where I can find

The right vibe for my own death-song?

People try to act on me,

Exercise some sort of right,

But I just want to be free

And will continue to fight!

My tender leanings shall not be used to bait me,

I will not let myself be caught and put to jail,

However golden is the cage they have for me;

Perhaps this means all my attemps to love will fail…

I used to believe I could love well, and be loved,

I’ve learnt this was but the fancy of a young head;

I can only love poorly, and badly be loved,

My inadequacy fills me with dread…