Peer Reviews by Erin Griley

ROSHOMON STYLE STORY

Nicholas Barba 

Story Structure: 5- Nice Set up + character development 

Characterization: 5, could feel all personalities in story very well

Ideas: 5- perhaps too much detail, try to narrow it down, but still good. 

Designing/Organization: 4, could be smoother. Use better transitions

Specific Assignment Directions: 3, use different perspectives, more about Andrew and Ricky's perspectives.

Description: 4, Use better language and word choice

Word Choice: 3, uses "obviously" and "honestly" alot, try to use different words

Setence Variety: 4, some more variety should be used

Voice/Sense of Audience: 4, could be a little more sophisticated sounding

Grammar/Punctuation: 3, some commas needed in 2nd paragraph and throughout 

Spelling and Word Usage: 4

Overall assignment presentation: 5

Total: 49

Assessment: Best aspect of this assignment is: very nice detail, could really feel like I was there.

One aspect of this assignment that may require further revision is: some cleaning and revising. Word choice. Eliminate some excess detail and do some more perspective work. 

The grade I would give this assignment is: B

Lisa Adams

Story Structure: 5. Good setting and plot. Felt like I was there and could imagine it.

Characterization: 4. Good character developmen and narration.

Ideas: Excellent buildup and details. Ideas are clear.

Designing/Organization: Good focus, but focus more on perspectives rather than just your side of the story.

Specific Assignment Directions: 3. Needs more about other people's perpectives. Doesn't meet all requirements.

Description: 5 Great language and detail

Word Choice: 4

Setence Variety: 4

Voice/Sense of Audience: 4 Very clear and sophisticated.

Grammar/Punctuation: 5

Spelling and Word Usage: 5

Overall assignment presentation: 5

Total: 52

Assessment: Best aspect of this assignment is: very good at story telling and organization. not confusing at all. 

One aspect of this assignment that may require further revision is: Add rashomon elements to this story

The grade I would give this assignment is: B+

Megan Ho

Story Structure: 5. Very good plot and setting

Characterization: 5 Can clearly understand the characters and their positions

Ideas: 5. Very clear. Ideas are laid out and organized

Designing/Organization: 5. Focus clearly on boys attending your all-girls school. Very clear and concise idea

Specific Assignment Directions: 5, Very nice rashomon style writing

Description: 4 Great devices and language

Word Choice: 5 

Setence Variety: 4

Voice/Sense of Audience:5 very clear

Grammar/Punctuation: 5

Spelling and Word Usage: 5

Overall assignment presentation: 3 missing professor in heading. good title

Total: 57

Assessment: Best aspect of this assignment is: very clear and organized. written well and follows assignment clearly

One aspect of this assignment that may require further revision is:  nothing major, just cleaning up some sentences

The grade I would give this assignment is: A

Jerralyn Satrio 

Story Structure: 3. Not very story like. More examples and elaboration

Characterization: 3. Some mention of characters, but not developed.

Ideas: 3. Elaborate on ideas and details. Use examples.

Designing/Organization: Jumps around alot. No clear focus

Specific Assignment Directions: 2. No story or persceptives on a conflict. 

Description: 4. Nice writing style.

Word Choice: 4

Setence Variety: 4

Voice/Sense of Audience: 3

Grammar/Punctuation: 4. Some grammar errors. commas needed

Spelling and Word Usage: 4

Overall assignment presentation: 4 MLA title capitalized and page #s

Total: 41

Assessment: Best aspect of this assignment is: Really nice ideas and concepts. Insightful

One aspect of this assignment that may require further revision is: not a story and needs more examples and elaboration. 

The grade I would give this assignment is: B-

MEET CUTE STORY

Carla Ventura

Story Structure: 4 - Good job setting up the story, and then organizing it. It was easy to follow. 

Characterization: 4 - Nice character development. Try to develop Jim just a tad more at the beginning. Maybe what the girl was wearing? 

Ideas: 4 - Good ideas and structure of them. I like the concept of the park. 

Designing/Organization: 5 Good organization. I like how it starts with his day and keeps going. 

Specific Assignment Directions: 5 Followed the meet cute style. 

Description: 4 Good writing style

Word Choice: 3- Try other words. Uses some words more than once. Could use some variety.

Setence Variety: 4

Voice/Sense of Audience: 4

Grammar/Punctuation: 4 

Spelling and Word Usage: 4 One word spelled wrong. "Piqued interest" should be "peaked"

Overall assignment presentation: 4

Total: 49

Assessment: Best aspect of this assignment is: Really nice story plot. Made me want to read on. 

One aspect of this assignment that may require further revision is: Possibly add a description of the park more. Maybe the weather to set the mood so it's easier to visual. 

The grade I would give this assignment is: B+

Tiffany Nguyen

Story Structure: 

Characterization:

Ideas: 

Designing/Organization: 

Specific Assignment Directions: 

Description: 

Word Choice: 

Setence Variety: 

Voice/Sense of Audience: 

Grammar/Punctuation: 

Spelling and Word Usage: 

Overall assignment presentation: 

Total: 

Assessment: Best aspect of this assignment is: 

One aspect of this assignment that may require further revision is: 

The grade I would give this assignment is: