Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller: The Brave, the Bald, and the Bumbling

by Sir Reginald Bunbury-Smythe, Court Historian

Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller: A King Unlike Any Other

In the annals of history, Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller stands as a figure of both great renown and amusement. A man of towering ambition and often questionable judgment, he ruled the Kingdom of Sicily from 1130 to 1154 and left behind a legacy that still stirs laughter and debate today.

A King of Many Names

Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller was known by many names during his lifetime. Some, like "the Great Count" and "the Magnificent," reflected his accomplishments. Others, like "the Bald" and "the Bull," were less flattering. But it is his most obscure nickname, "Hunkemoller," that has captured the imagination of posterity.
The origin of this peculiar moniker is unknown, but legend has it that Roger gained it during a battle with the Emir of Tunisia. As the two armies clashed, Roger supposedly shouted, "Hunk! Em oller!," meaning "Strike! Let us go!" in Sicilian. Whether this tale is true or not, it is a testament to Roger's reputation as a fearless warrior.

A King of Grand Ambitions

Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller was a man of grand ambitions. He dreamed of uniting all of Italy under his rule and establishing a Mediterranean empire that would rival the Roman Empire of old. To this end, he launched a series of campaigns against his rivals, including the Holy Roman Empire, the Byzantine Empire, and the Papacy.
Roger's military prowess was undeniable. He led his armies to victory after victory, conquering vast territories and expanding his kingdom to its greatest extent. However, his ambitions often overreached his capabilities, leading to a series of humiliating defeats.

A King of Comic Misadventures

Despite his military prowess, Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller was also a man of great humor and impeccable comic timing. Numerous tales have been passed down through the centuries about his misadventures, both on and off the battlefield.
One such tale recounts an incident during a diplomatic mission to the Holy Roman Empire. Roger, who was famous for his balding pate, was greeted by Emperor Frederick Barbarossa. As Frederick extended his hand in friendship, Roger's toupee, which he wore to conceal his baldness, fell off and landed at Frederick's feet.
Frederick, amused, picked up the toupee and placed it back on Roger's head, saying, "My dear Roger, it is customary to remove one's hat in the presence of the emperor."
Roger, blushing and stammering, could only utter, "But Your Majesty, it is not a hat, it is my hair!"

A King of Legacy

Despite his comic misadventures, Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller left behind a lasting legacy. He was a patron of the arts and sciences, and Palermo, his capital, became a center of learning and culture. He also reformed the Sicilian legal system and promoted religious tolerance in a time of great religious strife.
Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller was a complex and fascinating figure. He was a great warrior, a visionary king, and a man of undeniable humor. His legacy continues to inspire and entertain us today, reminding us that even the most powerful of rulers are not immune to the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.

Call to Action

If you have enjoyed this brief glimpse into the life of Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller, I encourage you to delve deeper into this fascinating historical character. Numerous books and articles have been written about him, and there are even online resources dedicated to his legacy. So, join me in raising a glass to the memory of Roger II of Sicily Hunkemoller, a man who proved that even kings can be both great and gloriously ridiculous.